A few weeks ago I had yet another breakthrough in my grieving process … my losses previously left me feeling as though all my pregnancy experiences had been robbed of their “innocence”. But, that’s not what had happened at all – my experience with pregnancy and motherhood has really just … changed … and I’ve grown emotionally as a woman and mother. The experiences I’ve had means that I now relate more empathetically with so many more women and mothers. It was a moment of realization that left me feeling lighter, full of love and with less sadness on my heart.
One afternoon my SIL and I were discussing her current pregnancy and how her baby is all over the place bouncing and super active during her ultrasounds. It reminded me of my ultrasounds with Aoife – she moved all over the place, expecially in the mornings. Because of my age I had more ultrasounds with her in the short 17 weeks I carried her than all my previous pregnancies combined! Those memories are happy ones and I did not feel sad talking about it at all. Such a lovely moment this past month to share with another woman. I am so happy and excited to be an Auntie all over again, too!
Since I last posted I’ve had to watch a friend move two states away (again!), got to visit with another friend that moved two states away last year, and spent some fun times with friends that hopefully aren’t moving anytime soon! We’ve gone camping, celebrated some milestones and enjoyed spontaneous meet-ups for no reason at all. I’ve definitely shed some tears but spent the majority of my off hours relaxing, laughing and planning epic life experiences. Lately I’m extremely focused on hiking the John Muir Trail in the next 3-5 years. Especially now that Ed has committed to hiking it with me – but first we have to get into a house! This gives me plenty of time to read, plan and learn how to be an ultra light-weight backpacker, right?! 220 miles ain’t no joke and I want to be ready!
On to the F*ck It List!
Feel better: Body, Heart and Soul – This morning as I was rolling over my shoulder (the “frozen” one) POP Pop popped! While that might sound bad or painful, my doctors told me that during recovery this is a good thing, and usually right after it happens I have increased mobility. It’s a weird feeling, not too painful, but sure enough this morning my range of motion has increased a little. I would say I’m at about 85-90% recovered. My goal is to be 100% by September. I have been diligent in my stretching and strengthening exercises and I feel so close to complete recovery.
Back in April, when Ed and I went on our trip to Utah, I resolved to lose the weight I’ve been carrying around since December. So far I have lost 11 pounds, but only 6 officially working with the best nutritionist in the world, Katie Pena – Nutritionist Extroidinare. I will be working with her over the next year, meeting once a month, and I want to get back to my lean, mean, running machine of a body by next spring.
Continue paying off debt – despite the fact that I accidentally booked a cabin in Greer for NYE and paid it straight out of my bank account (oops!, I meant to charge it and pay it off over the next couple of months) causing us to live off PB& J’s for the week … debt pay-off is still on track!
Get rid of all the extra shit I have in my house – This weekend Ed and I cleared out so much crap! There is a huge pile along the side of the garage that is going out next Friday to be picked up by the Veteran’s Association. I’m sure you’ve gotten those mailers with the yellow bags? Purging feels so good.
Run one race a month in memory of Sweet Pea and Aoife Roux – In May Ed and I ran the Whiskey Row Marathon 10K on Aoife’s due date. It was very emotionally cleansing for me. Plus we had the BEST weekend in Prescott and Cottonwood looking as antiques, sightseeing and visiting my favorite winery and his favorite brewery in the area.
Last weekend Lyzi, Jess and I ran a 5K, on the hottest day of the year so far, for the Fearless Kitty Rescue in Scottsdale. It was tough – I am not sure the temperature when we were running the race, but it was already 100 degrees when we left and the high was 116 that day. Crazy, but we did it!
Plan two week-long vacations – I think that our two vacations in September and our NYE trip to Greer is going to count as our second week-long vacation. NO MORE VACATIONS – we gotta focus on buying a house!
PHX Summit Challenge – November PHX5 – still waiting for them to announce that registration is open! Can’t wait to do this event.
Plan an EPIC hike – Phantom Ranch? Peralta to First Water? – I am trying to convince my husband to let me join a group going to hike Humphrey’s Peak in Flagstaff at the end of this month. So far threats, pouting, fit throwing and poopy-looks have not elicited approval. Ideas, people? The issues – he’s wants to do it with me and isn’t physically ready AND technically we pinky swore no more spending money on travel this year. I want to just go up, camp (cheap, right?), hike and only stay one night. If I went without Starbucks for two weeks that would pay for my trip, boom, easy. But, he just says, “The mountain is not going anywhere.” PFFT. PFFT, I say!
Be ready to house hunt Jan 2017, move in spring (with as little shit) to pack as possible – we are probably 50% through with purging and we’re going to start working on packing now. It’s going to be weird with all the walls bare and shelves cleared out of non-essentials, but I know once the house-buying process starts we’ll be glad we took the time to methodically purge and pack when it was not stressful to do so.
All in all – life is pretty damn good right now. Gonna go make myself a PB&J and enjoy the rest of my Sunday. Love to you all! ❤